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From the books ... Alcoholics Anonymous (Big Book) and Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions (12 & 12)
Click the page number or the book cover icon
to view that page in the literature.1.
2.
3.
4.
Is he not a victim of the delusion that he can wrest satisfaction and happiness out of this world if he only manages well?
5.
Being all powerful, He provided what we needed, if
we kept close to Him and performed His work well.
6.
7.
Even though your protégé may not have entirely admitted his condition, he has become very curious to know how you got well.
8.
But he will be curious to learn why his own convictions have not worked and why yours seem to work so well.
9.
Perhaps your story will help him see where he has failed to practice the very precepts he knows so well.
10.
11.
12.
13.
If the family will appreciate that dad's current behavior is but a phase of his development,
all will be well.
14.
Say that you believe he is a
gravely ill person, with this qualification -- being perhaps fatally ill, does he want to get well?
15.
They often jeopardize
their own positions by trying to help serious drinkers who should
have been fired long ago, or else given an opportunity to get well.
16.
But a few did, and when these laid hold of A.A. principles with all the fervor with which the drowning seize life preservers, they almost invariably got well.
17.
18.
19.
Service, gladly rendered, obligations squarely met, troubles well accepted or solved with God's help, the knowledge that at home or in
the world outside we are partners in a common effort, the well-understood fact that in God's sight all human beings are important, the proof that love freely given surely brings a full return, the certainty that
we are no longer isolated and alone in self-constructed prisons, the surety that we need no longer be square pegs in round holes but can fit and belong in God's scheme of things -- these are
the permanent and legitimate satisfactions of right living for which no amount of pomp and circumstance, no heap of material possessions, could possibly be substitutes.
20.
This is the experience which has led us to the conclusion that
our group conscience,
well-advised by its elders, will be in the long run wiser than any single leader.
21.
We admit we have some of these symptoms, but we have not gone
to the extremes you fellows did, nor are we likely to, for we understand ourselves so
well after what you have told us that such things cannot happen again.
22.
But what about his responsibilities -- his
family and the men who would die because they would not know how to get well, ah -- yes,
those other alcoholics?
23.
Can we now, with the help of God as we understand Him, handle them as well and as bravely as our nonalcoholic friends often do?
24.
In fact, the effectiveness of the whole A.A. program will rest upon how well and earnestly we have tried to come to "a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him."
25.
We'd gather up derelicts from skid rows, sort out those who could get well, and make it possible for the rest to earn their livelihood in a kind of quarantined confinement.
26.
27.
28.
To clergymen, doctors,
friends, and families,
the alcoholic who means
well and tries hard is a heartbreaking riddle.
29.
Though we work out our solution on the spiritual as well as an altruistic plane, we favor hospitalization
for the alcoholic who is very jittery or befogged.
30.
New groups started up and it was found, to the astonishment
of everyone, that A.A.'s message could be transmitted in the mail as
well as by word of mouth.
31.
32.
It is A.A.'s experience that
particularly in these cases we ought to pray that God's will, whatever it is, be done for others as well as for ourselves.
33.
Finally, we begin to see that all people, including ourselves, are
to some extent emotionally ill as well as frequently wrong, and then we approach true tolerance and see what real love for our fellows actually means.
34.
In such a case, this imperious urge can destroy his chances for material and emotional security as well as his standing in the community.
35.
This seemed to me like an opportunity to be helpful, so I spent two hours talking about alcoholism,
the malady, and described
the symptoms and results
as well as I could.
36.
37.
All sections of this country and many of its occupations are represented, as well as many political, economic, social, and religious backgrounds.
38.
39.
But hospitals, as well as
other places of recuperation, ought to be
well outside A.A. -- and medically supervised.
40.
But hospitals, as well as
other places of recuperation, ought to be
well outside A.A. -- and medically supervised.
41.
Among us are wives, relatives and friends whose problem has been solved, as well as some who have
not yet found a happy solution.
42.
Why shouldn't I do as well as
they?
43.
44.
Neither does A.A. take any particular medical point of view, though we cooperate widely with the men of medicine as well as with the men of religion.
45.
You, as well as your husband,
ought to think of what you can
put into life instead of how much you can take out.
46.
In this prodigy of service, he was well assisted by Sister Ignatia at St. Thomas Hospital in Akron, Ohio, one of the greatest friends our Fellowship will ever know.
47.
48.
49.
He is often perfectly sensible and well balanced concerning everything except liquor, but in that respect he
is incredibly dishonest and selfish.
50.
51.
52.
If he temporizes and still thinks he can ever drink again, even beer, he might as well be discharged after the next bender which, if an alcoholic, he is almost certain to have.
53.
If you are sure your man does not
want to stop, he may as well be discharged, the sooner the better.
54.
We thought well before taking this step making sure we were ready; that we could
at last abandon ourselves utterly to Him.
55.
Rightly and naturally,
we think well before we choose the person or persons with whom to
take this intimate and confidential step.
56.
57.
58.
Nearly every modern employer feels a moral responsibility for the well-being of his help, and he tries to meet these responsibilities.
59.
For the readiness to take
the full consequences of
our past acts, and to take responsibility for
the well-being of others at the same time, is the very spirit of Step Nine.
60.
Readiness to take consequences of our past
and to take responsibility for well-being of others is spirit of Step Nine.
61.
Being mostly business or professional folk, we could
not well carry on our occupations in such an event.
62.
Being mostly business or professional folk, we could
not well carry on our occupations in such an event."
63.
X. Every service responsibility should be matched by an equal service authority, with the
scope of such authority well defined.
64.
And we think that the whole range of our needs is well defined by that part of Step Eleven which says: "...knowledge of His will for us
and the power to carry that out."
65.
But you should feel under no obligation to keep him on, for your obligation has been well discharged already.
66.
This brave philosophy, wherein each man plays God, sounds good in the speaking, but it still has to meet the acid test: how well does it actually work?
67.
Practically every A.A. member declares that no satisfaction has been deeper and no joy greater than in a Twelfth Step job well done.
68.
Here we cast up a balance sheet, crediting ourselves with things well done, and chalking up debits where due.
69.
Having so considered our day, not omitting to take due note
of things well done, and having searched our
hearts with neither fear nor favor, we can truly thank God for the blessings we have received
and sleep in good conscience.
70.
71.
What with our ultra-modern standards, our scientific approach to everything, we are perhaps
not well equipped to apply the powers of good that lie outside our synthetic knowledge.
72.
73.
74.
As the whisky rose to my head I told myself I would manage better next time, but I might as well get good and drunk then.
75.
Our basic troubles are the
same as everyone else's, but when an honest effort is made "to practice these principles
in all our affairs," well-grounded A.A.'s seem to have the ability, by God's grace, to take these troubles in stride and turn them into demonstrations of faith.
76.
Well, hardly.
77.
78.
79.
As we approach the actual
taking of Step Seven, it might be well if we A.A.'s inquire once more just what our deeper objectives are.
80.
81.
But if we have prepared ourselves well in advance, such reactions will not deflect us from our steady and
even purpose.
82.
In all these strivings, so many of them well-intentioned, our crippling handicap had
been our lack of humility.
83.
How many times have we heard well-intentioned people claim the guidance of God when it was all too plain that
they were sorely mistaken.
84.
85.
Well, it did.
86.
Well, just that did happen and more, for what I had
learned of alcoholism
did not occur to me at all.
87.
88.
A well-known doctor, chief physician at a nationally prominent hospital specializing
in alcoholic and drug addiction, gave Alcoholics Anonymous
this letter:
89.
90.
Understand he was once a
well-known lawyer in town, but just now we've got him strapped down tight.(*)
91.
After they have succumbed
to the desire again, as so many do, and the phenomenon
of craving develops, they
pass through the well-known stages of a spree, emerging remorseful, with
a firm resolution not to
drink again.
92.
Alcoholics Anonymous
began in 1935 at Akron, Ohio, as the outcome of a meeting between a well-known surgeon and a New York broker.
93.
94.
For the type of alcoholic
who is able and willing to get well, little charity, in the ordinary sense of the word, is needed or wanted.
95.
From great numbers of such experiences, we could
predict that the doubter
who still claimed that he
hadn't got the "spiritual angle," and who still considered his well-loved A.A. group the higher power, would presently love God and call Him by name.
96.
97.
Had they fired me first, and
had they then taken steps to
see that I was presented
with the solution contained in this book, I
might have returned to them six months later, a well man.
98.
But today, in well-matured A.A.'s, these distorted drives have been
restored to something
like their true purpose and direction.
99.
Some who feel they have done
well may dispute this, so let's try to think it through a little further.
100.
Well, meditation is like that, too; it helps to envision our spiritual objective before we try to move toward it.
101.
102.
103.
I, who had thought so well of
myself and my abilities,
of my capacity to surmount obstacles, was cornered at last.
104.
I insisted that few drunks could ever get well on their own steam, but that in our groups we could do together
what we could not do separately.
105.
106.
107.
But hospitals, as well as
other places of recuperation, ought to be
well outside A.A. -- and medically supervised.
108.
But hospitals, as well as
other places of recuperation, ought to be
well outside A.A. -- and medically supervised.
109.
If we really depended upon God, we couldn't very well play God to our fellows nor would we feel the urge wholly to rely on human protection and care.
110.
111.
112.
113.
Even when we were well reestablished in our business, these terrible fears often continued to haunt us.
114.
115.
We well remember how something deep inside us kept rebelling against the idea of bowing before any God.
116.
I well remember the shock I received when a prominent doctor in Chicago told me of cases where pressure of the spinal fluid actually ruptured the brain.
117.
118.
It has been well said that "almost the only scoffers at
prayer are those who never tried it enough."
119.
120.
Well, so had I.
121.
The town was well supplied with churches and
schools in which I pursued
my early educational activities.
122.
Because A.A.'s Twelve Traditions repeatedly ask us to give up personal desires for the common good, we realize that the sacrificial spirit --
well symbolized by anonymity -- is the foundation of them all.
123.
Before long, your listener may well tell a story or two about himself which will place you even more at ease.
124.
125.
126.
When we have finally admitted without reservation that we are powerless over alcohol, we are apt to breathe a great sigh of relief, saying, "Well, thank God that's over!
127.
128.
129.
130.
131.
If the founder and his friends have served well, they may -- to their surprise -- be reinstated
for a time.
132.
133.
134.
Even so, when making specific requests, it will be well to add to each one of them this qualification: "...if it be Thy will."
135.
136.
137.
One more suggestion: Whether the family has spiritual convictions or not, they may do well to examine the principles by which the alcoholic member is trying to live.
138.
139.
140.
Even if he displays a certain amount of neglect and irresponsibility towards the family, it is
well to let him go as far as he likes in helping other alcoholics.
141.
142.
143.
Though we have no religious connection, we
may still do well to talk with someone ordained by an established religion.
144.
145.
146.
Service, gladly rendered, obligations squarely met, troubles well accepted or solved with God's help, the knowledge that at home or in
the world outside we are partners in a common effort, the well-understood fact that in God's sight all human beings are important, the proof that love freely given surely brings a full return, the certainty that
we are no longer isolated and alone in self-constructed prisons, the surety that we need no longer be square pegs in round holes but can fit and belong in God's scheme of things -- these are
the permanent and legitimate satisfactions of right living for which no amount of pomp and circumstance, no heap of material possessions, could possibly be substitutes.
147.
Most of us must admit that we
have loved but a few; that we
have been quite indifferent to the many so
long as none of them gave us trouble; and as for the
remainder -- well, we have
really disliked or hated them.
148.
149.
Well, we surely have a chance if we switch from "two-stepping" to "twelve-stepping," if we are
willing to receive that grace of God which can sustain and strengthen us
in any catastrophe.
150.
151.
Well, we were frightened.
152.
Said he, "Well, what about it?
153.
154.
155.
156.
157.
158.
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