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From the books ... Alcoholics Anonymous (Big Book) and Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions (12 & 12)
Click the page number or the book cover icon
to view that page in the literature.1.
Rightly and naturally,
we think well before we choose the person or persons with whom to
take this intimate and confidential step.
2.
3.
Since Step One requires an admission that
our lives have become unmanageable, how could people such as these take this Step?
4.
5.
6.
Yet it is only a step.
7.
8.
Understanding is the key
to right principles and
attitudes, and right action is the key to good living; therefore the joy of good living is the theme of A.A.'s Twelfth Step.
9.
10.
Our Twelfth Step also says that as a result of practicing all
the Steps, we have each found something called a spiritual awakening.
11.
12.
13.
Maybe we are doing fine on only two of them, the First Step and that part of the Twelfth where we "carry the message."
14.
15.
16.
17.
18.
It was soon apparent that while alcoholics would spend lavishly on Twelfth Step cases, they had a terrific aversion to dropping money into a meeting-place hat for group purposes.
19.
20.
21.
Step Eight -- "Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all."
22.
In Step Eight, we continued our housecleaning, for we saw
that we were not only in conflict with ourselves, but also with people and situations in
the world in which we lived.
23.
At these critical moments, if we remind ourselves that "it is better
to comfort than to be comforted, to understand
than to be understood, to love than to be loved," we will be following the intent of Step Eleven.
24.
Step Eleven -- "Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying
only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out."
25.
26.
In Step Eleven we saw that if a Higher Power had restored us to sanity and had enabled us to
live with some peace of mind in a sorely troubled world, then such a Higher Power was worth knowing better, by as direct contact as possible.
27.
And we think that the whole range of our needs is well defined by that part of Step Eleven which says: "...knowledge of His will for us
and the power to carry that out."
28.
We may often pass through Twelfth Step experiences where we will seem to be temporarily off the beam.
29.
30.
So intense, though, is our
fear and reluctance to do
this, that many A.A.'s at first try to bypass Step Five.
31.
32.
33.
More realism and therefore more honesty about ourselves are
the great gains we make under the influence of Step Five.
34.
Step Five -- "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another
human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
35.
36.
Many an A.A., once agnostic or atheistic, tells us that it
was during this stage of
Step Five that he first actually felt the presence of God.
37.
Our moral inventory had persuaded us that all-round
forgiveness was desirable, but it was only when we resolutely tackled Step Five that we inwardly knew we'd be able to receive forgiveness and give it,
too.
38.
39.
40.
This has always been so obvious that only a very few A.A.'s have ever worked the Twelfth Step for a fee.
41.
This was Step Four.
42.
43.
44.
If we have swept the searchlight of Step Four back and forth over our careers, and it has revealed
in stark relief those experiences we'd rather not remember, if we
have come to know how wrong thinking and action have hurt us and others, then the need to quit living by ourselves with those tormenting ghosts of yesterday gets more urgent than ever.
45.
46.
47.
Since Step Four is but the beginning of a lifetime practice, it can be suggested that he first have
a look at those personal flaws which are acutely troublesome and
fairly obvious.
48.
Step Four is our vigorous and painstaking
effort to discover what
these liabilities in each
of us have been, and are.
49.
50.
51.
Beginning with Step Four, we commenced to search out the things in ourselves which
had brought us to physical, moral, and spiritual bankruptcy.
52.
Whenever our pencil falters, we can fortify and
cheer ourselves by remembering what A.A. experience in this Step has
meant to others.
53.
54.
55.
56.
57.
It is a step in the development of that kind of
humility that makes it possible for us to receive
God's help.
58.
59.
60.
Having found the shoes that fit, he ought to step into them and walk with new confidence that he is at
last on the right track.
61.
If we have obtained permission, have consulted with others, asked God to help and the drastic step is indicated we must not shrink.
62.
63.
Our Twelfth Step is never to be paid for, but those who labor in service for us are worthy of
their hire.
64.
When the Twelfth Step is seen in its full implication, it is really talking about the kind of love that has no price tag
on it.
65.
We usually conclude the
period of meditation
with a prayer that we be shown all through the day what our next step is to be, that we be given whatever we need to take care of such problems.
66.
The Seventh Step is where we
make the change in our attitude which permits us,
with humility as our guide,
to move out from ourselves toward others and toward God.
67.
Though our decision was a
vital and crucial step, it could have little permanent effect unless at once followed by a strenuous effort to face, and to be rid of, the things in ourselves which had been blocking us.
68.
69.
70.
Practically every A.A. member declares that no satisfaction has been deeper and no joy greater than in a Twelfth Step job well done.
71.
Ignoring the fact that these
labors were not Twelfth
Step jobs at all, the critics attacked as A.A. professionals these workers of ours who were often doing thankless tasks that no one else
could or would do.
72.
73.
We thought well before taking this step making sure we were ready; that we could
at last abandon ourselves utterly to Him.
74.
If that is so, this step may be postponed, only, however, if we hold ourselves in complete readiness to go through with it at the first opportunity.
75.
Readiness to take consequences of our past
and to take responsibility for well-being of others is spirit of Step Nine.
76.
Good judgment, a careful sense of timing, courage, and prudence -- these are the qualities we shall need when we take Step Nine.
77.
For the readiness to take
the full consequences of
our past acts, and to take responsibility for
the well-being of others at the same time, is the very spirit of Step Nine.
78.
We followed this up in Step Nine by making direct amends to those concerned, except when it
would injure them or other people.
79.
Step Nine -- "Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do
so would injure them or others."
80.
Next we launched out on a course of vigorous action, the first step of which is a personal housecleaning, which many
of us had never attempted.
81.
If we would gain any real advantage in the use of this Step on problems other than alcohol, we shall need to make a brand new venture into open-mindedness.
82.
Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate.
83.
Since Step One requires an admission that
our lives have become unmanageable, how could people such as these take this Step?
84.
Step One showed us an amazing paradox: We found that we were
totally unable to be rid of the alcohol obsession until we first admitted that we were powerless over it.
85.
86.
Only Step One, where we made the 100 percent admission we were
powerless over alcohol, can be practiced
with absolute perfection.
87.
88.
89.
90.
91.
It marked the time when we
could commence to see the full implication of Step Seven: "Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings."
92.
93.
94.
As we approach the actual
taking of Step Seven, it might be well if we A.A.'s inquire once more just what our deeper objectives are.
95.
Then, in Step Seven, we humbly asked God to remove our shortcomings such as He
could or would under the conditions of the day we asked.
96.
97.
98.
99.
100.
101.
At Step Six, many of us balked -- for the practical reason that we did
not wish to have all our defects of character removed, because we still loved some of them too much.
102.
103.
He goes on to explain that any person capable of enough willingness and honesty
to try repeatedly Step Six on all his faults -- without any reservations whatever -- has indeed come a long way spiritually, and is therefore entitled to be
called a man who is sincerely trying to grow in the image and likeness of his own Creator.
104.
105.
So Step Six -- "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character" -- is
A.A.'s way of stating the best possible attitude one can take in order to make a beginning on this lifetime
job.
106.
Since this Step so specifically concerns
itself with humility, we
should pause here to consider what humility is
and what the practice of it can mean to us.
107.
108.
109.
But when we approach Step Ten we commence to put our A.A. way
of living to practical use, day by day, in fair weather or foul.
110.
By this time, at Step Ten, we had begun to get a basis for daily living, and we keenly realized that we would
need to continue taking personal inventory, and that when we were in the wrong we ought to admit it promptly.
111.
This thought brings us to
Step Ten, which suggests we continue to take personal inventory and continue to
set right any new mistakes as we go along.
112.
113.
Every time we have tried to professionalize our Twelfth Step, the result has been exactly the same: Our single purpose has been defeated.
114.
115.
Every man and woman who has joined A.A. and intends to stick has, without realizing it, made a beginning on Step Three.
116.
Once we have come into agreement with these ideas,
it is really easy to begin the practice of Step Three.
117.
Like all the remaining Steps, Step Three calls for affirmative action, for it
is only by action that we can cut away the self-will which has always blocked the entry of God -- or, if you like, a Higher Power -- into our lives.
118.
Then it is explained that other Steps of the A.A. program can be practiced with success only
when Step Three is given a determined and persistent trial.
119.
120.
Practicing Step Three is like the opening of a door which to all
appearances is still closed and locked.
121.
Step Three -- "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God, as we understood Him."
122.
To make this increasingly possible
is the purpose of A.A.'s Twelve Steps, and Step Three opens the door.
123.
124.
Consequently, in Step Three we turned our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
125.
Being convinced, we were
at Step Three, which is that we
decided to turn our will and our life over to God as we understood Him.
126.
Every newcomer in Alcoholics Anonymous is
told, and soon realizes for himself, that
his humble admission of
powerlessness over alcohol is his first step toward liberation from its paralyzing grip.
127.
128.
129.
Step Twelve -- "Having had a
spiritual awakening as
the result of these steps, we
tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and
to practice these principles in all our affairs."
130.
131.
132.
133.
134.
The moment they read Step Two, most A.A. newcomers are confronted with a dilemma,
sometimes a serious one.
135.
136.
In Step Two we saw that since we could not restore ourselves to sanity, some Higher Power must necessarily do so if we were to survive.
137.
This vital Step was also the means by which we began to get the feeling that we could be forgiven, no matter what we had thought or
done.
138.
139.
We found it very desirable to take this spiritual step with an understanding person, such as our wife, best friend, or spiritual adviser.
140.
Often it was while working on this Step with our sponsors or spiritual advisers that we first felt truly able to forgive others, no matter how deeply we felt they had wronged us.
141.
142.
143.
144.
145.
146.
There are many opportunities even for those of us who feel unable to speak at meetings or who are so situated that we cannot do much
face-to-face Twelfth Step work.
147.
148.
149.
150.
151.
He paid a fine tribute to the Fellowship;
he told how his family had
been reunited; he extolled the virtue of honesty; he recalled the joys of Twelfth Step work; and then he lowered the boom.
152.
The moment this Twelfth
Step work forms a group, another discovery is made -- that most individuals cannot recover unless there is a group.
153.
154.
Committees have instructed many an A.A. to stop working on a chronic backslider, only to be told:
"How I do my Twelfth Step work is my business.
155.
Twelfth Step work is never paid for, but those who labor in service for us are worthy of their hire.
156.
157.
158.
159.
160.
We can be the ones who take on
the unspectacular but important tasks that make good Twelfth Step work possible, perhaps arranging for the
coffee and cake after the meetings, where so
many skeptical, suspicious newcomers
have found confidence and
comfort in the laughter
and talk.
161.
By a great deal of ardent Twelfth Step work we sometimes carry the message to so many alcoholics that they place
us in a position of trust.
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Alcoholics Anonymous, the
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Grapevine Inc. have no objection to the use of this material in the
164 and More concordance.
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