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From the books ... Alcoholics Anonymous (Big Book) and Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions (12 & 12)
Click the page number or the book cover icon
to view that page in the literature.1.
2.
Here is one.
3.
When I returned to the hotel it struck me a highball would be fine before going to bed, so I stepped into the bar and had one.
4.
We cannot be helpful to all people, but at least God will show
us how to take a kindly and tolerant view of each and every one.
5.
6.
7.
8.
The alcoholic's past thus becomes the principal asset of the family and frequently it is
almost the only one!
9.
10.
11.
12.
13.
The moment they read Step Two, most A.A. newcomers are confronted with a dilemma,
sometimes a serious
one.
14.
15.
And so it is: the beginning of the end of his old life, and the beginning of his
emergence into a new one.
16.
He is the bewildered one.
17.
18.
Since defective relations with other human beings have nearly always been the immediate cause of our woes, including our alcoholism, no field of investigation
could yield more satisfying and valuable
rewards than this one.
19.
And this they did find, in measure to transcend all
the defects of their frail
craft, every test of uncertainty, pain, fear, and despair, and even the death of one.
20.
21.
22.
Straightway he appeared at New York's A.A. headquarters, asking, "Is
there anything in our tradition that suggests I
shouldn't take a job like this one?
23.
What a debate we had on that one!
24.
As by some deep instinct, we
A.A.'s have known from the very beginning that we must never, no matter what the provocation, publicly take sides in any fight, even a worthy one.
25.
26.
27.
28.
The ability of each A.A. to identify himself with and bring recovery to the newcomer is
a gift from God... passing on this gift to others is our one aim.
29.
This is our gift from God, and its bestowal upon others like us is the one aim that today animates A.A.'s all around the globe.
30.
31.
It was then discovered that when one alcoholic had planted in the mind of another the true nature of his malady, that person could never be the same again.
32.
Each day, somewhere in the world, recovery begins when one alcoholic talks with another alcoholic, sharing experience, strength, and
hope.
33.
34.
35.
If we are now about to ask forgiveness for ourselves, why shouldn't we start out by forgiving them, one and all?
36.
37.
38.
39.
There are the same fast friendships, there is the same helpfulness to one another as you find among our western friends.
40.
41.
How we loved to shout the damaging fact that millions of the 'good men of religion' were still killing one another off in the name of God.
42.
Let us reemphasize that
this reluctance to fight
one another or anybody else is not counted as some special virtue which makes us feel superior to other people.
43.
They say to one another, "Perhaps it would be
a good idea if we continue to keep a firm hand on A.A. in this town.
44.
If there were no social instinct, if men cared nothing for the society of one another, there would be no society.
45.
The doctors weren't trying to find how different we were from one another; they sought to find whatever personality traits, if any, this group of alcoholics had in common.
46.
47.
With one arm around the shoulder of religion and the other around the shoulder of medicine, we'd resolve their
differences.
48.
49.
He came and got me home and to bed, gave me a few drinks that night, and one bottle of beer the next morning.
50.
My old manner of life was by no means a bad one, but I would not exchange its best moments for the worst I have now.
51.
They comfort the melancholy one by first showing him that his case is not strange or different, that his character defects are probably not more numerous or worse than those of anyone else in A.A.
52.
For the wise have always known that no one can make much of his life until self-searching becomes a regular habit, until he is able to admit and accept what he finds, and until he patiently and persistently tries to correct what is wrong.
53.
So Step Six -- "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character" -- is
A.A.'s way of stating the best possible attitude one can take in order to make a beginning on this lifetime
job.
54.
Members of a family should
watch such matters carefully, for
one careless, inconsiderate remark has
been known to raise the very devil.
55.
56.
57.
There can only be one consideration which should qualify our desire for a complete disclosure of
the damage we have done.
58.
Mercifully, no one could guess that I was to have no real employment for five years, or hardly draw a sober breath.
59.
60.
The Twelve Steps that summarize the program may
be called los Doce Pasos in one country, les Douze Etapes in another, but they trace exactly the same path to recovery that was blazed by
the earliest members of
Alcoholics Anonymous.
61.
62.
If outside donations weren't declined, absolutely cut off, then the
Foundation would one day become rich.
63.
They had said that though I
did raise a defense, it
would one day give way before some trivial reason for having a drink.
64.
One day he told me about an executive of
the same bank who, from his description, was undoubtedly alcoholic.
65.
66.
67.
68.
69.
70.
Some of us veered from extreme to extreme, ever hoping that one day our loved ones would be themselves once more.
71.
Perhaps the fear will always lurk in every A.A. heart that one day our name
will be exploited by somebody for real cash.
72.
"The American Public Health Association presents a Lasker Group Award for 1951 to Alcoholics Anonymous in recognition of its unique and highly successful approach to
that age-old public health and social problem, alcoholism ... In emphasizing alcoholism
as an illness, the social
stigma associated with
this condition is being blotted out ... Historians may one day recognize Alcoholics Anonymous to
have been a great venture in
social pioneering which
forged a new instrument for social action; a new therapy based on the kinship of common suffering; one having a vast potential for the myriad other ills of mankind."
73.
74.
75.
Out of this alloy of drink and speculation, I commenced to forge the weapon that one day would turn in its flight like a boomerang and all but
cut me to ribbons.
76.
This should be an entirely personal affair which each one decides for himself in the light of past associations, or his present choice.
77.
78.
79.
80.
81.
82.
To be gravely affected,
one does not necessarily
have to drink a long time nor take
the quantities some of us have.
83.
84.
One dramatic experience after another clinched this determination until it became our universal tradition.
85.
86.
If hundreds of experiences have shown him
that one drink means another debacle with all its attendant suffering and
humiliation, why is it he
takes that one drink?
87.
If hundreds of experiences have shown him
that one drink means another debacle with all its attendant suffering and
humiliation, why is it he
takes that one drink?
88.
We would not even do the cause
of temperate drinking
any good, for not one drinker in a thousand likes to be told anything about alcohol by one who hates it.
89.
90.
The feeling of having shared in a common peril is one element in the powerful cement which binds us.
91.
92.
93.
94.
Ignoring the fact that these
labors were not Twelfth Step jobs at all, the critics attacked as A.A. professionals these workers of ours who were often doing thankless tasks that no one else
could or would do.
95.
Sometimes this was a tedious process; we hope no one else will be prejudiced for as long as
some of us were.
96.
97.
Following his physical
rehabilitation, he had a talk with me in which he frankly
stated he thought the treatment a waste of effort, unless I could assure him, which no one ever had, that in the future he would have the "will power" to resist the impulse to drink.
98.
99.
Unless one's family expresses a desire to live upon spiritual principles we think we ought not to urge them.
100.
101.
Dr. Foster Kennedy, neurologist:
"This organization of Alcoholics Anonymous calls on two of the greatest reservoirs of power known to man, religion and that instinct for association
with one's fellows ... the
'herd instinct.'
102.
103.
104.
105.
Women now make up more
than one-fourth of the membership; among newer members, the proportion is nearly one-third.
106.
107.
There is a complete failure of the kind of defense that keeps one from putting his hand on a hot stove.
108.
If he can afford it, he may have liquor concealed all over his house to be certain no one gets his entire supply away from him to throw down the wastepipe.
109.
Had they been left to themselves, and had they stuck to their one goal, they might have found the rest of the answer.
110.
Being wrecked in the same vessel, being restored and united under one God, with hearts and minds attuned to the welfare of others, the things which matter so much to some people no longer signify much to them.
111.
112.
Maybe this sounds as though the alcoholics in A.A. had suddenly gone peaceable, and become one great big happy family.
113.
It never fails, if you go about it with one half the zeal you have been in the
habit of showing when you
were getting another drink.
114.
Unlike most of our crowd, I
did not get over my craving for liquor much during the first two and one-half years
of abstinence.
115.
116.
117.
"The American Public Health Association presents a Lasker Group Award for 1951 to Alcoholics Anonymous in recognition of its unique and highly successful approach to
that age-old public health and social problem, alcoholism ... In emphasizing alcoholism
as an illness, the social
stigma associated with
this condition is being blotted out ... Historians may one day recognize Alcoholics Anonymous to
have been a great venture in
social pioneering which
forged a new instrument for social action; a new therapy based on the kinship of common suffering; one having a vast potential for the myriad other ills of mankind."
118.
119.
Under these compulsions
of self-preservation, duty, and love, it is not strange that our Society has
concluded that it has but one high mission -- to carry the A.A. message to those who don't know there's a way out.
120.
121.
We, of Alcoholics Anonymous, are more than one hundred men and women who have recovered from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body.
122.
123.
124.
Alcoholics Anonymous
is a worldwide fellowship of more than one hundred thousand(*) alcoholic men and women who are banded together to solve their common problems and to help fellow sufferers in recovery from that age-old, baffling malady, alcoholism.
125.
Years later, this tough Irish customer liked to say, "My sponsor sold me one idea, and that was sobriety.
126.
127.
We have not once sought to be
one in a family, to be a friend among friends, to be a worker among workers, to be a useful member of society.
128.
Yet it is our great hope that all those who have as yet found no
answer may begin to find one in the pages of this book and will presently join us on the high road to a new freedom.
129.
One instance comes to mind in which a malicious individual was
always making friendly little jokes about an alcoholic's drinking exploits.
130.
131.
132.
133.
134.
The alcoholic, his wife,
his children, his "in-laws",
each one is likely to have fixed ideas about the family's attitude towards himself or herself.
135.
Notwithstanding the great necessity for discussing ourselves
with someone, it may be one
is so situated that there is no suitable person available.
136.
137.
138.
If you don't care for the one
I've suggested, you'll be sure to discover one that suits if only you look and listen.
139.
140.
141.
142.
143.
In later life he finds that real happiness is not to be found
in just trying to be a number one man, or even a first-rater in the heartbreaking struggle
for money, romance, or self-importance.
144.
145.
146.
147.
We find the more one member of the family demands that the others concede to him, the more resentful they become.
148.
Among many employers nowadays, we think of one member who has spent much of his life in the world of big business.
149.
No beer or liquor was sold in the neighborhood, except at
the State liquor agency where perhaps one might procure a pint if he could convince the
agent that he really needed it.
150.
151.
152.
153.
154.
155.
Finally, when all our score
cards read 'zero,' and we saw that one more strike would put us out of the game forever, we had to look for our
lost faith.
156.
One more suggestion: Whether the family has spiritual convictions or not, they may do well to examine the principles by which the alcoholic member is trying to live.
157.
158.
Looking at this avalanche of mail one morning at the office, I paced up and down ranting how irresponsible and tightwad my fellow members were.
159.
One morning he took the bull by the horns and set out to tell those he feared what his trouble had been.
160.
161.
162.
True, most of us thought good character was desirable, but obviously
good character was something one needed to get on with the business of being self-satisfied.
163.
One new story has been added to Part I, and two that originally appeared in Part III have been repositioned there; six stories have been deleted.
164.
In addition to these casual get-togethers, it became customary to set apart one night a week for a meeting to be attended by anyone or everyone interested in a spiritual way of life.
165.
166.
One night, when confined in a hospital, he
was approached by an alcoholic who had known a spiritual experience.
167.
One object is to disclose damaged or unsalable goods, to get rid of them promptly and without regret.
168.
But if a willing start is made, then the great advantages of doing this will so quickly reveal themselves that the
pain will be lessened as one obstacle after another melts away.
169.
You should be described to him as one of a fellowship who, as part of their own recovery, try to help others and who will be glad to talk to him if he cares to see you.
170.
If you ask him why he started on that last bender, the chances are he will offer you any one of a hundred alibis.
171.
172.
Some day we hope that Alcoholics Anonymous will help the public to a better realization of the gravity of the alcoholic problem, but we shall be of little use if our attitude is one of bitterness or hostility.
173.
174.
175.
176.
177.
178.
179.
180.
181.
182.
183.
184.
185.
186.
187.
188.
It may be one of our own family, but we cannot disclose anything to our wives or our parents which will hurt them and make them unhappy.
189.
Another feeling we are very likely to entertain is one of resentment that love and loyalty could not cure our husbands of alcoholism.
190.
After high school came four years in one of the best colleges in the country
where drinking seemed to
be a major extra-curricular activity.
191.
I had been obliged to discharge him for drinking, though he was brilliant, alert, and one of the best organizers I have ever known.
192.
193.
I would sometimes hide out in one of the clubs of which I was a member,
and had the habit at times of
registering at a hotel
under a fictitious name.
194.
On account of my enormous
capacity for beer, I was elected to membership in
one of the drinking societies, and soon became one of the leading spirits.
195.
196.
197.
198.
One of the first members of A.A., entirely contrary to his own desires, was obliged to conform to group opinion.
199.
If you have a drinking problem, we hope that you may pause in reading one of the forty-two personal stories and think: "Yes, that happened to me"; or,
more important, "Yes, I've felt like that"; or, most important, "Yes, I believe this program can work for me too."
200.
201.
202.
Even when we have tried hard and failed, we may chalk that up as one of the greatest credits of all.
203.
In this prodigy of service, he was well assisted by Sister Ignatia at St. Thomas Hospital in Akron, Ohio, one of the greatest friends our Fellowship will ever know.
204.
Perhaps one of the greatest rewards of meditation and prayer is
the sense of belonging
that comes to us.
205.
Here, for instance, is a typical example: An officer of one of the largest banking institutions in America
knows I no longer drink.
206.
My next move was to take up the study of medicine, entering one of the largest universities in
the country.
207.
Many years ago one of the leading contributors to
this book came under our care in this hospital and while here he acquired some ideas which he put into practical application
at once.
208.
On account of my enormous
capacity for beer, I was elected to membership in
one of the drinking societies, and soon became one of the leading spirits.
209.
By this time I was beginning to pay very dearly physically and, in hope of relief, voluntarily incarcerated myself at least a dozen times in one of the local sanitariums.
210.
One of the many doctors who had the opportunity of reading
this book in manuscript form told us that the use of sweets was often helpful, of course depending upon a doctor's advice.
211.
212.
213.
The American Psychiatric Association requested,
in 1949, that a paper be prepared by one of the older members of Alcoholics Anonymous to
be read at the Association's annual meeting of that year.
214.
I say this after many years' experience as Medical Director of one of the oldest hospitals in the country treating alcoholic and drug addiction.
215.
216.
217.
218.
219.
We doubt if many of them can do
it, because none will really want to stop, and hardly one of them, because of the peculiar mental twist already acquired, will find he can win out.
220.
221.
222.
223.
Even so, when making specific requests, it will be well to add to each one of them this qualification: "...if it be Thy will."
224.
Our hope is that many alcoholic men and women, desperately in need, will see these pages, and we believe that it is only by fully disclosing ourselves and our problems
that they will be persuaded
to say, "Yes, I am one of them too; I must have this thing."
225.
226.
One of these men, staff member of a world-renowned hospital, recently made this statement to some of
us: "What you say about the general hopelessness of
the average alcoholic's
plight is, in my opinion,
correct.
227.
228.
"Bill's Story," "Doctor Bob's Nightmare," and one other personal history from the first edition were retained intact; three were edited and one of these was retitled; new versions of two stories were written, with new titles; thirty completely new stories were added; and the story section was divided into three parts, under the same headings that are used now.
229.
230.
231.
232.
In a weak moment he may take your dislike of his high-stepping friends as one of those insanely trivial excuses to drink.
233.
His wife is one of those persons who really feels there is something rather sinful about these commodities, so she nagged, and her intolerance finally threw him into a fit of anger.
234.
235.
How then shall we help our readers determine, to their
own satisfaction, whether they are one of us?
236.
To us it is not far-fetched,
for this kind of thinking
has been characteristic of every single one of us.
237.
By temperament, nearly
every one of us had been an irrepressible promoter, and the prospect
of a society composed almost entirely of promoters was frightening.
238.
239.
240.
With each passing day of our lives, may every one of us sense more deeply the inner meaning of A.A.'s simple prayer:
241.
Aided by such instruction and example
as we can find, it is essentially an individual adventure, something which each one of us works out in his own way.
242.
243.
It could almost be said that
we were born with it, for, as one oldtimer recently declared, "Practically never have I heard a heated religious, political, or
reform argument among A.A. members.
244.
245.
"Bill's Story," "Doctor Bob's Nightmare," and one other personal history from the first edition were retained intact; three were edited and one of these was retitled; new versions of two stories were written, with new titles; thirty completely new stories were added; and the story section was divided into three parts, under the same headings that are used now.
246.
We say to ourselves, "This
one ought to be cured of his fatal malady," or "That one ought to be relieved of his emotional pain," and we pray for these specific things.
247.
We say to ourselves, "This
one ought to be cured of his fatal malady," or "That one ought to be relieved of his emotional pain," and we pray for these specific things.
248.
No one ought to say the A.A. program requires no willpower; here is one place you may require all you've got.
249.
250.
Tradition One -- "Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon A.A. unity." Without unity, A.A. dies. Individual liberty, yet great unity. Key to paradox: each A.A.'s life depends on obedience to spiritual principles.
The group must survive or the individual
will not. Common welfare comes first. How best to live and work together as groups.
251.
Already a willingness
has been achieved to cast out one's own
will and one's own ideas about the alcohol problem in favor of those suggested by A.A.
252.
Already a willingness
has been achieved to cast out one's own
will and one's own ideas about the alcohol problem in favor of those suggested by A.A.
253.
254.
255.
This odd trait of mind and emotion, this perverse wish to hide a bad motive underneath a good one, permeates human affairs from top to bottom.
256.
No one ought to say the A.A. program requires no willpower; here is one place you may require all you've got.
257.
258.
But all who are in the least reasonable will agree upon one point: that there is plenty wrong with us alcoholics about which plenty will have to be done if we are to expect sobriety, progress, and any real ability to cope with life.
259.
260.
261.
5. Each Alcoholics Anonymous group ought to be a spiritual entity having but one primary purpose -- that of carrying its message to the alcoholic
who still suffers.
262.
Five -- Each Alcoholics Anonymous group ought to be a spiritual entity having but
one primary purpose -- that of carrying
its message to the alcoholic who still suffers.
263.
Five -- Each group has but one primary purpose -- to carry its message to the alcoholic
who still suffers.
264.
Tradition Five -- "Each group has but one primary purpose -- to carry its message to the alcoholic who still suffers."
265.
"Each group has but one primary purpose -- to carry its message to the alcoholic who still suffers."
266.
Before we leveled off a bit, A.A. looked more like one prodigious squabble than
anything else, at least on the surface.
267.
268.
Then, under one provocation or another,
the aggrieved one would unearth the old affair and angrily cast its ashes about.
269.
If even one publicly got drunk, or was lured into using A.A.'s name for his own purposes, the damage might be
irreparable.
270.
When the broker returned
to New York in the fall of 1935, the first A.A. group had actually been formed, though no one realized it at the time.
271.
272.
So, for one reason or another, they cover these men, hoping matters will take a turn for the better.
273.
274.
275.
Since Step One requires an admission that
our lives have become unmanageable, how could people such as these take this Step?
276.
277.
278.
About this time a lady called up my wife one Saturday afternoon saying she wanted me to come over that evening to meet a friend of hers who might help me.
279.
One school would allow man no
flavor for his fare and the other would have us all on a straight pepper diet.
280.
281.
282.
283.
284.
When many hundreds of people are able to say that the consciousness
of the Presence of God is today the most important fact of their lives, they present a powerful reason why one should have faith.
285.
Step One showed us an amazing paradox: We found that we were
totally unable to be rid of the alcohol obsession until we first admitted that we were powerless over it.
286.
Ideas, emotions, and attitudes which were once the
guiding forces of the lives of these men are suddenly cast to one side, and a completely new set of conceptions and motives begin to dominate them.
287.
The doctor said: "You have the
mind of a chronic alcoholic. I have never seen one single case recover, where that state of mind existed to the extent that it does in you."
288.
To spend too much time on any one situation is to deny some other alcoholic an opportunity to live and be
happy.
289.
290.
All these, and many others,
have one symptom in common: they cannot start drinking without developing the phenomenon of craving.
291.
When the man is presented
with this volume it is best
that no one tell him he must abide by its suggestions.
292.
293.
If you don't care for the one
I've suggested, you'll be sure to discover one that suits if only you look and listen.
294.
295.
296.
297.
Women now make up more
than one-fourth of the membership; among newer members, the proportion is nearly one-third.
298.
299.
To certain newcomers and
to those one-time agnostics who still cling to the A.A. group as their higher power, claims for the power of prayer may, despite all the logic and experience in proof of it, still be unconvincing or quite objectionable.
300.
301.
302.
303.
So did a friend of mine who
was a one-time vice-president of the American Atheist Society, but he got through with room to spare."
304.
305.
That will arise in the occasional situation
where to make a full revelation would seriously harm the one to whom we are making amends.
306.
Two -- For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authority -- a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern.
307.
2. For our group purpose
there is but one ultimate authority -- a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience.
308.
Tradition Two -- "For our group purpose there is but
one ultimate authority -- a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience. Our leaders
are but trusted servants;
they do not govern."
309.
"For our group purpose there
is but one ultimate authority -- a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience. Our leaders
are but trusted servants;
they do not govern."
310.
Two -- For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authority -- a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience.
311.
One unkind tirade or one willful snap judgment can ruin our relation with another person for a whole day, or maybe a whole year.
312.
One voice says, "I read a piece in the newspapers...";
another, "We heard a radio program..."; and still another, "We saw a moving picture..." or "We saw something about A.A. on television...."
313.
314.
No one wants to be angry enough to murder, lustful enough to rape, gluttonous enough to ruin his health.
315.
No one wants to be so proud that he is
scorned as a braggart, nor so greedy that he is labeled a thief.
316.
It then occurred to me that after one was all smelled up with beer nobody could tell what had been drunk, so I began to fortify my beer with straight alcohol.
317.
This was only a beginning, though if honestly and humbly made, an effect, sometimes a very great one, was felt at once.
318.
319.
320.
We were in a position where life was becoming impossible, and if we had passed into the region from
which there is no return through human aid, we had but two alternatives: One was to go on to the bitter end, blotting out the consciousness of
our intolerable situation as best we could;
and the other, to accept spiritual help.
321.
322.
In a very real sense he has been transformed, because he
has laid hold of a source of strength which, in
one way or another, he had hitherto denied himself.
323.
324.
325.
326.
327.
328.
329.
Only Step One, where we made the 100 percent admission we were
powerless over alcohol, can be practiced
with absolute perfection.
330.
331.
To one who feels he is an atheist or agnostic such an experience seems impossible, but to continue as he is means disaster, especially if
he is an alcoholic of the hopeless variety.
332.
333.
The unselfishness of these men as we have come to know them, the entire absence of profit motive, and their community
spirit, is indeed inspiring to one who has labored long and wearily in this alcoholic
field.
334.
We would not even do the cause
of temperate drinking
any good, for not one drinker in a thousand likes to be told anything about alcohol by one who hates it.
335.
Even the newest of newcomers finds undreamed rewards as he tries to help his brother alcoholic, the
one who is even blinder than he.
336.
The bleeding deacon is
one who is just as surely convinced that the group cannot get along without him, who constantly connives for
reelection to office,
and who continues to be consumed with self-pity.
337.
338.
339.
The elder statesman is the
one who sees the wisdom of the group's decision, who holds no resentment over his reduced status, whose judgment, fortified by considerable experience, is sound, and
who is willing to sit quietly on the sidelines patiently awaiting developments.
340.
341.
342.
One unkind tirade or one willful snap judgment can ruin our relation with another person for a whole day, or maybe a whole year.
343.
No matter how much one wishes to try, exactly how can he turn his own will and his own life over
to the care of whatever God he thinks there is?
344.
This feeling of being at
one with God and man, this emerging from isolation through the open and honest sharing of our terrible burden of guilt, brings us to a resting place where we may prepare ourselves for the following Steps toward a full and meaningful sobriety.
345.
The real tests of the situation are your own willingness to confide
and your full confidence
in the one with whom you share
your first accurate self-survey.
346.
Then, under one provocation or another,
the aggrieved one would unearth the old affair and angrily cast its ashes about.
347.
If anyone questions whether he has entered this
dangerous area, let him try leaving liquor alone for one year.
348.
349.
350.
351.
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